Funeral poems for a father

In the days leading up to a funeral, many people find themselves searching for the right words to capture a lifetime of memories with their father. It’s often a poem that says what feels impossible to put into your own words.

Whether read aloud during the funeral, printed in the order of service, or kept as a quiet keepsake afterwards, the right poem can offer comfort, express love, and help mark a father’s life with the dignity it deserves.

In this article, we’ve gathered guidance on choosing and personalising funeral poems for a father to help you find the right words.

The role of poetry in a father’s funeral

When you lose someone so central to your life, it often feels as though everyday language just isn’t good enough. Poetry provides a way to give your grief structure, particularly when finding your own words feels like an incredible challenge during such intense grief.

A thoughtful poem can:

• Be read during the ceremony by a family member or your Minister, Priest, Humanist, or Celebrant
• Serve as a quiet reflection within the order of service booklet
• Be kept as a small memorial card for guests to hold onto
• Bring a sense of shared peace to everyone gathered to say goodbye

While there are no requirements for including poetry, many families find it offers a deeply poignant way to mark a final farewell.

Finding the right words

There is no standard poem choice when it comes to honouring a father. The best poem is the one that rings true to his character. You might consider:

The life he led

Was he defined by his determination in life, his sense of humour, or maybe a passion for the outdoors or a particular sport or team? A poem about water might be perfect for a man who spent his time fishing by the Tay, for example, while a more introspective verse might suit someone who preferred the comfort of home.

The speaker

If a younger family member is reading the poem, then a simpler, clearer piece might be best. The emotional tone also matters. Some verses offer a gentle lift, while others acknowledge the depth of the loss. And either choice is right, depending on the atmosphere you want to create.

The intended use

A reading intended for a quiet moment in the service may differ in length and style from a short verse chosen to accompany a photograph on a keepsake card.

Styles of poems to explore

• Classic and spiritual selections use traditional language or scripture for those whose lives were rooted in their faith
• Modern and secular choices explore memory through a human lens, ideal for a more personal or non-religious gathering
• Tributes from a child focus on the unique bond between a father and his children, often used as a final message of thanks
• Brief reflections use succinct lines that provide a thoughtful touch to printed materials without requiring a long spoken reading
• Heritage and local connections involving Scots poetry or verse that touches on a father’s pride in his roots or his home town can be a moving addition for many local families

If you’re looking for a specific piece of writing but can only remember a few lines, our team is always happy to help you find the full version.

Creating your own poem

You are not limited to using a poem exactly as it was originally written. Many people find meaning in:

• Adjusting the words of an existing poem, perhaps by including a specific nickname or reference that was special to him
• Collaborating on a tribute, where siblings or grandchildren contribute a few honest lines – the emotion behind the words is far more important than the rhyme
• Combining verse with memories, such as a well-loved photograph or a mention of his favourite place or hobby

A simple verse becomes something very special and meaningful when it reflects the man you knew. Here are two short, original examples written to be used or adapted as you wish.

For the father of quiet strength:

His was a love that lived in deeds, not just in things he said; in steady hands and patient ways, and the quiet life he led. We hold his lessons in our hearts, though we are now apart, and find his wisdom guiding us in every quiet start.

For the father who loved to laugh:

You filled the days with stories told and laughter bright and free; you never were one for standing still, that’s how you’ll always be. So we will share the tales you loved and toast to all you knew, remembering you with a smile, the way you’d want us to.

If you would like help tailoring these or finding something different, we are here to support you in creating a tribute that feels just right.

Practical considerations

• Choosing a reader: While often a family member, you can also ask a close friend or your funeral director to read if you prefer
• The timing: Verse often works well as an introduction to a eulogy or as a final, reflective note at the end of the ceremony
• Printed keepsakes: Including the text in the printed materials allows guests to take those meaningful words home with them
• Focus on the feeling: There is no need for a perfect performance; a reading shared from the heart is what people will remember, even if your voice wavers occasionally

Our commitment to your family

Saying goodbye to a father is a deeply personal and difficult journey, and our teams across Dundee and St Andrews are here to help you navigate it.

We are available to listen to your stories, understand his unique spirit, and help you find the poems or readings that best honour his memory. Whether you need a little guidance or a lot, we are here to make this process a little easier for you.

Funeral Poems

He Is Gone

By David Harkins 

You can shed tears that he is gone
or you can smile because he has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back
or you can open your eyes and see all he has left.

Your heart can be empty because you can’t see him
or you can be full of the love you shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday 
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember him and only that he’s gone
or you can cherish his memory and let him live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

Epitaph on my own Friend

By Robert Burns

An honest man here lies at rest,
As e’er God with His image blest:
The friend of man, the friend of truth;
The friend of age, and guide of youth:
Few hearts like his, with virtue warm’d,
Few heads with knowledge so inform’d:
If there’s another world, he lives in bliss;
If there is none, he made the best of this.

Do Not Stand At My Grave and Weep

By Mary Frye

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.

His Journey’s Just Begun

By Ellen Brenneman

Don’t think of him as gone away
His journey’s just begun,
Life holds so many facets
This earth is only one.

Just think of him as resting
From the sorrows and the tears
In a place of warmth and comfort
Where there are no days and years.

Think how he must be wishing
That you could know today
How nothing but your sadness
Can really pass away.

And think of him as living
In the hearts of those he touched…
For nothing loved is ever lost
And he was loved so much.

Get in touch for support

If you would like to discuss readings or any other aspect of planning a service for your father, please reach out to us:

• Call us: speak directly with a member of our experienced team on 01382 452110
• Visit us: you are welcome to speak with us in person at one of our local branches
• Email us: enquiries@jamesashton.co.uk
• Contact page: full details for all offices are available on our contact page
• Facebook: follow or message us on Facebook for updates, information, or to get in touch in a way that feels comfortable for you

There are no obligations and no pressure. Whether you have a specific question or simply want to talk things through, we are always here to support you.